If…

     If i’m going to die i won’t be sad because i’ve nothing to lose.. and it doesn’t matter how or when or why.. the world with or without me is still the same .. my life is so boring.. because…

     When the thing that makes you happy is the same thing that makes you sad.. when the one you want to be with is the one you have to leave.. when you fall in love you fall apart.. when you cant get what you really want, everything around you is no big deal.. when you say yes and all you get is no.. when you force your self to live while there’s nothing left to live for.. when you breathe and feel the beats of your heart without being alive.. when you lose the thing you tried to get so hard.. when you pray to be with those you love and deep inside your soul you know even miracles won’t let you be with them.. when you wake up and realize it’s another day without being with them..

     after all, you wish the whole world comes to an end and you go to the heaven.. the happiness you dreamed about ..the thing that last forever..

     You read love poems just for the sake of love.. you hear a love story and you know you ain’t the one who’s ment to be with someone.. all you need was love and you couldn’t get it.. you can’t even dream about it like before.. you are not young anymore..everything has changed.. you hope things would get better but things keep getting worse.. self helping books wont help you with that.. it won’t bring back the years you lost … it can’t erase your past and give you a new life.. it cant change your destiny.. even you.. you cant change anything about your life.. all you can do is trying to live with the changes that other people made to you..

     I’ve a very black vision about this world .. but i’m very optimistic about my life in the heaven..

     For the one i loved .. the one who didnt try to love me back.. the one that i’m just a friend to him and i’ll never be more than that..the one who doesnt care .. the one who doest ment to be mine..